Title: I Want to Let It Go
Author: elirwen
Pairing: Arthur/Merlin
Rating: PG
Word Count: 524
Beta: none
Summary: The secret is heavy on my shoulders. There are people who know, but none of them can understand the weight of it. They are not bound to greatness by prophecies, not responsible for so many fates.
Notes: I come with a song!fic. I was just listening to Evanescence's Lithium and the words just kind of kept popping up in my head. So I wrote them down and gave them some order. :)



Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.
Oh, but God, I want to let it go.


The secret is heavy on my shoulders. There are people who know, but none of them can understand the weight of it. They are not bound to greatness by prophecies, not responsible for so many fates.


Come to bed, don't make me sleep alone.
Couldn't hide the emptiness, you let it show.
Never wanted it to be so cold.
Just didn't drink enough to say you love me.


It's hanging between us. Separating us. Even when you hold me close at night, the lies and deceits are there too, creating the growing gap, the chill creeping through it and pushing tiny blades right into my heart, slowly breaking me.


I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.


You never ask. You stay silent and comforting. Only your eyes tell me that you know something is wrong. And I'm looking into them, trying to convey my love and devotion while losing myself to the pain of thoughts that are haunting me.


Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.


Days run around us. Threats being averted. New coming in their place. Never stopping. I always help and feed the gap between us with another mysteries.


Don't want to let it lay me down this time.
Drown my will to fly.
Here in the darkness I know myself.
Can't break free until I let it go.
Let me go.


I want to tell. I want you to know. But the fear is too strong. You're the prince, the king's son. What if your father's law means more to you than me?


Darling, I forgive you after all.
Anything is better than to be alone.


You know what it feels like to be responsible for your actions, to change people's lives with just a few words or a gesture. And I see you struggle with the thought. I see you to be afraid of your power too.

You need someone to share the burden with. You need me.

I just have to find the right time.


And in the end I guess I had to fall.
Always find my place among the ashes.


Another execution. The ashes from the pyre are constant reminder of the king's wrath. The courtyard is full of them, uncleanable, soaked deep in the soil beneath the stones.

Maybe I'll join them soon.


I can't hold on to me,
Wonder what's wrong with me.

Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.
Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without...
Lithium, ...stay in love with me.
I'm gonna let it go.


The power is surging through my veins and still I feel helpless like a caged animal, trapped inside my own insecurities.

I have to let the boundaries fall.

Let you in.

Let you decide my fate.

I am only for you after all.